The "Tuxedo at McDonald's" Problem
Some students have a strange hobby. They love to hunt for big, giant, scary words. They do not want to say "I am tired." No, that is too simple. They want to say, "I am exhausted and fatigued." They think this makes them sound like a professor. It does not.
Using big, fancy words in a normal conversation is weird. It is like wearing a tuxedo to eat at McDonald's. You think you look elegant, but everyone else is looking at you and thinking, "What is wrong with this guy?" If you say "Nevertheless" and "Furthermore" to your friend, your friend will run away.
The Rule of "Boring Words"
Here is a secret: Native speakers are lazy. We use the same small words every day. We use "get," "go," "have," and "do" about 5,000 times a day. We almost never use words like "flabbergasted" or "overwhelmed."
If you want to communicate, you must love the boring words. Here is how to stop being a poet and start being a speaker:
- The Coffee Shop Test: Before you learn a new word, ask yourself: "Can I use this to buy coffee?" If the answer is No, throw the word away. You do not need it yet.
- Don't Be a Parrot: Don't repeat words you found in a 100-year-old book. English changes. If you speak like Shakespeare, people will think you are acting in a play.
- Simple is Strong: Saying "I understand" is strong. Saying "I comprehend the nuances of your statement" is painful for everyone.
Be Clear, Not Clever
Your goal is to send a message, not to win a vocabulary competition. Nobody cares how many big words you know. They care if you can answer a question. So, put down the dictionary. Learn the easy words first. Save the big words for your Nobel Prize speech.
